One Word

Everyone has been asked at some point by a college application letter or silly myspace suvey that one question: What ONE word would you choose to describe yourself?

I’ve always answered with eclectic, or eccentric (which is like eclectic with a little crazy genius thrown in).  I want to be everywhere and do everything all at once, and I want to learn and retain all of the knowledge and experiences in the process (you can see where the crazy might come in).   I have always had a wide taste in everything- music, movies, books, foods, drinks, cultures, interests.  It occured to me that some people might call this “flaky”.  It could be said that my interests change based on what’s hip or which people I hang out with.  But anyone who has known me long enough knows I have definitely never been hip or trendy.  And why yes, I do do different things based on who I am with because I like doing all these things and they might not.  So we can both be happy by doing what they want then why make anyone unhappy?

Which brings me to another word– Genuine.  I have never though of it before, but “Genuine” would be a good word to describe me.  I have a weird selection of tastes because I choose things I genuinely like, without regard to what other people think.  I do the same with people.  I choose to associate with people I genuinely like, and not with people because they might make me popular or “have connections” or whatnot.  When I interact with people, it is in a genuine manner.  Anyone who knows me well enough knows me as too nice.  I am too nice to everybody, and get taken advantage of a lot.  But I do it because I genuinely care.  Even if I know people aren’t going to tip me, I’m still nice, because I know what it’s like to barely have the money for the food let alone a tip.  But you best not be rude to me.

I don’t care if I’ve known you for five years or five seconds, I take everything personally and to heart.  If you are rude to me, I wonder what I said to make you so.  If you don’t tip me, I wonder what I forgot to do.  If you ignore me or blow me off, I wonder what I did to upset you.  If you dump me, I ask what I did wrong.  My inquisitive nature gives me the need to understand everything all the time.  I need explanations. If you are crying, I want to know why and what I can do to fix it.  If you are having a bad day or week, I want to make it better.  If you are sick I want you to get better.  And silly naive little me expects the same things from other people.

But lets face it, there are very few genuine people left in this world.  Most people are out for themselves.  Some people pretend to care about others, but only to further some agenda they have.  Meanwhile, the people who are genuine are constantly struggling.  Struggling to help everyone else, to make everything work, to care for their loved ones, to understand the cruel and ungiving world we live in.  In all my studies, I will never understand the most basic of human social concepts.  I will never understand lying and cheating and manipulating.  I will never understand the need to “fit in”, which is not the same as the human need to “belong”.  I will never understand war and violence and cruelty.  No matter how cynical and jaded and bitter I have become (which I really have, sadly), the naive little girl in me will always wish everyone could just live happily ever after.

So I challenge you, among all the other words you may be, may one day everyone be called “genuine”.

Most Memorable Memories in Life Were Once a Crazy Random Happenstance

A few months ago, I wrote a post about some of my favorite “things” (which were actually more like memories).   Most of these things were not planned, they kind of just happened.  I feel like sometimes someone pushes us to go somewhere because that is where we are supposed to be.  A couple months later, I wrote a post about opening myself up to more unexpected opportunities that could turn into these types of memories.  (P.S. Links to both of those posts are contained within the text!)  I would like to update and expand on both these posts to show that I am somewhat, slowly but surely, allowing myself to take such opportunities.

I would  like to add to my list of favorite memories the Bikini Laser Tag Rave (yes you read that correctly) I attended because I happened to accept a free ticket to a Tampa Bay Storm Game where one of my friends happened to be reading a newspaper that had an article for an event happening the following night which I just happened to have off.  I had always wanted to attend a rave since high school, and this was a good, clean opportunity to do so.  And it was a blast.  I danced until dawn, made new friends, got a free photo shoot, and listened to some great music.  I would also like to add to my favorites list my two recent trips to Daytona.  Both were fairly random and last minute and ended up being tons of fun!  First was the Daytona 500 in February, which I would never have thought to go to until I won tickets and had a blast (and met Brad Paisley).  Second was a mini beach vacation with a friend that seemed to be just what the doctor ordered to add new life to my other wise busy schedule and just happened to fall on my two days off.  So yes, late night road trips, drinking all day, and good music with family and friends.  Sounds like a winning combination to me!

The moral of this post, and a few of my others, is that you never know what life has waiting around the corner.  You can plan all the trips you want, but, at the end of the day, the most memorable ones are the ones you weren’t expecting.  I figure I get particular days off for a reason, meet particular people for a reason, and end up in particular places for a reason.  I may not yet know that reason, but I’m pretty sure part of it is to have fun and enjoy life!

Fine Line Between Genius and Insanity

It is often said that there is a fine line between genius and insanity.  I tend to straddle it  on a regular basis.  Although, it has occurred to me that, while being incredibly intelligent, I’ve never really done anything that could be considered truly genius.  This would imply that perhaps I fall slightly more to the “insane” side than I would like to believe.  The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.  I tend to repeat the same mistakes over and over again.  I could just be stupid, but then that would counter my previous statement about being smart.  So the only answer is that I am possibly insane.  Only thing is, insane people don’t question their sanity.  So by that logic, I couldn’t possibly be insane.  Perhaps just a little bit crazy.  All girls are at least a little bit crazy.  They even have a technical term for it- PMS.  So while I may not be truly genius or truly insane, I suppose I am still a girl.

Crazy Random Happenstances

I don’t usually write about too personal of things on here because: a) let’s face it, no one really cares and b) I don’t want to cause any trouble or stir up any drama by throwing anyone under the bus.  That being said, I feel I need to get a little personal to tell you how I have realized the rediculous and crazy way life works out regardless of your plans…

It started a few weeks ago when I got a sudden influx of self-confidence and general “throw caution to the wind” attitude.  I went out on a mission.  The same mission I’m sure any girl who has been single a little too long and had a little too much to drink might go on.  Needless to say, I met one guy one night, got hit on by a semi-famous guy the next, and rekindled a bit of an old flame the next.  Then I start panicking about what to do about them all.  So to help me out, life starts eliminating them for me… one lives to far away and is generally out of reach.  Down to two.  Both of them kind of fickle.  A week later I go out to meet one of them, but he has to bail.  So I do my thing- which apparently acts as a magnent even when I don’t want it to.  I turn down a lot of creeps that night.  Then one won’t take no for an answer.  Thinking I’ll probably never hear from him again, I give him my number and lo and behold, he’s the one I talk to the most!

I don’t tell you all this to hurt anyone, and I promise you I’m really not a floozie- they just kind of flock to me all at once (where was everybody for the six months I had no one!?!?)  I still hold to the fact that life puts each and every person in your path for a reason.  Even if only to teach you one small lesson.  And it seems the people I meet are never for the reasons I think!  It never ceases to amaze me the curve-balls life continues to throw.

Blog Stats

  • 3,294 hits